Today I was watching the funeral for the 4 fallen Oakland police officers online today. If I weren't sitting at me desk at work, I'd probably be balling my eyes out.
I've been to Oakland only a handfull of times, but it's a very important place for my family. My grandfather was a fireman in the city of Oakland, my father as well as my uncle and aunt were born and raised in Oakland. Of course, I know Oakland is now a very different place than it was then. However, I find it difficult to wrap my mind around what happened to these men. How can someone be so desperate that they're willing to end 4 people's lives because they think somehow, they won't get into even more trouble than they already are if they do so.
While I was on my honeymoon, my grandmother passed away. Somehow I felt selfish when I came back and heard the news. I thought to myself "How dare I go away on a vacation while my grandmother is dying. What is wrong with me?" I never got to tell my grandmother that I love her, or even goodbye...and I still feel bad about it to this day. Because when someone is gone, they're gone. There are so many things I wish I would've done differently towards her (ie. spent more time with her) had I know she would be gone when she was. I would've postponed my wedding, or moved it up so I could've been with her while she was leaving us.
I guess these are times when we realize life is too short to take time and people for granted. Grudges and disagreements aren't worth it because in the end, these are the people who will be there when you need them the most.
So, to all my family and friends - I love you.
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