I know that a roller coaster of a life is a lot better than a merry-go-round, but sometimes the grass looks greener...
I've been really struggling with the fact that I will have to choose how to proceed. I don't want to choose. I want to get pregnant. I want to stop trying, and succeed already. There are a lot of things to consider, but in the end, all I want is to be a mother. I'm tired of beating around the bush and get to the part where I get to tell my family that it's happened for us. It's at times like these where that instance feels like it'll never come.
I finally told my MIL what our options are and what I want to do. And being the logical person she is, she mentioned something that was like a ton of bricks hitting me. What about Jake's education? The demand for his attention will only grow with his pursuit of his Bachelor's and Master's degrees at SF State. With working full time, and his educational demands, is doing the injectables really the right choice? The injectables would become a demand within themselves and it would pile too much onto his plate with everything else in her.
So now I'm crying as I type this post because I'm more lost than ever. I know what I want and a 50/50 shot is better than any shot we've had thus far. Am I crazy? This just isn't fair.
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3 comments:
I did injectables and my dh's contribution was barely anything at all. I mean, I did make him inject my tummy, but even that I could have done on my own. The demands of a newborn will be 100,000 times more taxing on his job and education than helping you with a shot every night for a few days in a row.
I've not done injections myself but if you have any questions you should go ask on the IF board.
Lots of ladies there have done them many times and have great advice.
I am sorry your finding this decision so hard to make. I hope you find peace with it soon.
I haven't been through *exactly* what you are going through. However, I have wanted something so bad that I cried almost EVERY night cause I didn't have it.
It was out of my control.
I prayed.
Daily.
I cried.
Daily.
For 9 years.
God never told me "no"...
but He did tell me "WAIT".
Maybe it's not 'no', but 'wait'??
Sometimes this is harder to take.
I would ask "when, when, WHEN is it gonna be MY turn!?!?!?"
I am so, sooo sorry you are in this struggle!!
What I learned...it's worth WAITING for. I know this is not what you may want to hear, cause it was NOT what I wanted to here either...but it so very true!
I love you Laurel and I'm praying for you and this whole situation...hang in there!!!
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